I'll be seeing ya in 2011....

Every closing of a year is the end of a chapter in ones life.  

Here's a little story about a fancy party dress....

Never underestimate the changing fads of teenagers.  Just when you think you may have mastered what it is that they like or possibly, foolishly, think you may have stumbled upon something that they may...do I dare say it...love...you will undoubtedly be making the drive of shame back to the store...broken hearted dress in hand from whence you purchased it.

See when you saw it there hanging ever so lovely upon it's silver rack you pictured your daughters adoring face staring back at you proclaiming how you "are the best mother ever" and "how did you know that this is the EXACT  color and type of dress that I was wishing dreaming for".  This is the trickery of motherhood.

So now just a few weeks past homecoming I accompanied my friends for that dreaded drive of shame.  Of course we had to pull back the bag and admire the dress once more.  First glances were for admiration.  Second glances were to make sure the tag was still affixed and that there had been no harm to the garment that while we loved still needed to be in pristeen condition in order to return. 

The bitchy blessed teen swore that it wasn't worn other than to be tried on.  We had born witness that the dress that was purchased by the mom was not the chosen one and was not worn to the dance, but still how can we predict what kind of diva dancin around with a brush in hand may or may not have taken place on late nights in her room as the dress SHOULD have been hanging in it's protective plastic bag cocoon.  We did the once over, head to toe checks for any damage and came up with the all clear sign.

We made the drive across the lake talking all the while about how it was so pretty and how wonderful it would have been.  Once we arrived the mom that had originally purchased it was terrified to go in and return it given the time that had gone by.  I didn't understand her hesitation and nor did my other friend, but being the team players that we are we took her card, the dress and the receipt in for the return.

As we made our way to the formal department we began to feel a little uneasy as if we would be sent to the department store jail for trying to return a dress.  Before we could really think too much about it we were front and center at the dress counter.  The sales girl was polite and asked if we had the receipt.  We handed it over.  She pulled the dress out of the bag and began to locate both the tags that needed to be affixed in order to return a garment.

It was at that precise moment that my eyes fell upon a small stain that I hadn't noticed when we were back at the house.  I didn't dare look to the left of me at my other friend who was doing the bulk of the talking.  Another sales person walked up and bent down to grab something from underneath the counter.  Out of the very corner of my eye I could see that my girlfriend was getting a little antsy.  I was still VERY unwilling to look over at her. 

As I began to get jittery the transaction was done and we were on our way.  As we made our way to the exit of the  store I could barely contain myself and said, "oh my God did you see that stain"?

Her eyes got as big as quarters and said, "the stain....my God did you see the rip"?

We double stepped it out of the store in hopes of not being dragged back in and thrown in the mall jail.  Just another Wednesday in the land of parents with teenage daughters.  It's glamorous and oh so exciting!

~JP

Making my "Jo Bro Concert Survival Kit"

How are you gonna spend your Saturday night??

Me, I'm going to watch Jordyn Sparks and the Jonas Brother's!

Oh yeah...you're jealous. I know.

I could be in FL right now getting ready to hang out with the people that graduated from my high school (I can't believe it's been 15 years since I left that place...Go Tornado's). Instead I am creating a milestone in the mother daughter relationship I have with my two girls.

This is the first ever concert that I decided to take my kids to. I've taken my kids to the circus, plays and musicals...but no concerts. This is so not how I was raised. My mom started taking me to concerts when I was still in the womb. I cut my teeth with Carlos Santana, Three Dog Night and BB King. To be honest I think I had an unending contact high until I was nearly a year old. No wonder why my mom said I was such an easy child.

As time went on I weathered through Kenny Rogers...multiple times and was lugged from one outdoor music fest to another throughout my childhood and into my tween and teen years when all I really wanted to do was see New Kids on the Block, Debbie Gibson and Tiffany.

Today, however, will be the first concert that I have decided to partake in with my children and I chose the Jonas Brothers. WHAT....was I thinking? Oh, right I was thinking it was about the kids.

While this will mark the first ever concert for Han, Liv has been to a few concerts before with her dad. They are both excited but I have to admit Han takes the prize since she keeps coming in every so often to say, "Mom...do you know what today is? It's Jonas Brother's Day!".

Oh thank God she reminded me...I was worried I may forget. I mean it's so possible...not...that I might forget...not...especially seeing as I am putting out money that we don't have to buy these tickets and pay for a limo to make the experience "EXTRA SPECIAL". Yep, thanks Han...mommy was wondering why the day seemed fraught with anticipation.

Just a thought...but I wonder if they will think it's "EXTRA SPECIAL" when we are living by candle light and eating pb&j sandwiches for the next month.

But we did it. Jon agreed, every kid needs a special memory with their parents (notice how in previous sentences it is just me and the girls that are partaking in this "memory") and that sometimes you just gotta do it and worry about how it will affect finances later. Ummm....must take Xanax now to ward off anxious tendencies that come with spending money we don't have. Whew...that was close.

Side note...as me and the girls are enjoying our "special memory" moment...my beloved husband will be sitting back drinking one of the many Abita beers that is housed in our beverage refrigerator in the garage. Watching t.v. with no distractions...most likely in his boxers and cuddling with my dog. Lucky bastard!

Deep breath...feeling the effects of the sedative.

Okay...back to the concert preparations....

We are 3 hours away from leaving and now is the perfect time to get myself both mentally and physically prepared for the ear piercing screams that are going to befall my already partly diminished hearing (it all starts going down hill after 30) and the drama that always encompasses any night out with my girlfriends. It's like an ongoing episode of "Desperate Housewives". So here's what is in my survival kit:

Jonas Brother's Concert Survival Kit

The only surefire way to make sure you make it out alive without harming the squealing masses around you.

1. Hefty supply of Excedrin Migraine.
2. Ear plugs - you may want to hear the music, or not in this specific case, but this will drown out the crying fans.
3. Kleenex - you really don't want the kids snot on you after they cry over how much they "love them", "want to marry them", "want to date them", "want to runaway with them" and in the event there is not toilet paper (this is New Orleans anyways) you will be covered.
4. Gum - doesn't matter where you go or what you do, you ALWAYS need gum.
5. Fully charged cell phone - in case you get trapped by squealing masses you can phone a friend to come rescue you or better yet so you can FB or Twitter your time away.
6. Camera (preferably with ability to make video clips) - not to capture the "special moments" this is totally to capture the things that can be used as blackmail or YouTube clips (God I hope someone falls on stage).
   
7. Hand Sanitizer - I can't even begin to speculate at the amount of germs flowing around in this crowd.
8. Designated driver - for us tonight...it's a Limo...thank you Jesus!
9. Liquor - (but only if you have #8) if you've got the DD situation handled then my advice is a shot before, a drink while your there and one immediately after you get home!
10. Water - stay hydrated, this will allow you to escape to the serenity that is the bathroom.
11. Sedatives - if ya got em...take em!
    

I am all packed in a comfy over the shoulder bag...feels like I've gone back to the days of lugging around an infant with a diaper bag. Now I am off to play stylist to a 9 yr old (pictures to follow) and to prod the teen along in her 2 hour efforts to get ready. Apparently my gentle chiding of, "it's a concert, not a fashion show" are falling on def ears.

Even though I whine about this not being "my kind of thing" I know that they are both excited and I can't seem to shake the idea that I am too (maybe that is the sedative talking). This should be quite an experience.

~JP