Saturday, January 16, 2010

Well that's just the crazy talking....

I really truly hate being sick.  I think I spend so much time being sick that I've probably forgot how the hell it feels to live my life healthy.  I've coughed and hacked.  Slept and sweated.  I've medicated and medicated and medicated some more and now I'm just plain pooped.  My taste buds are shot and the only things that sound mildly appetizing to me on a continuous basis are freezy pops and saltine crackers.  Both of which I have to fight Penny for.  Damn dog.  I swear she doesn't get the fact that she is, in fact...a dog...and NOT a person.  I'm probably a lot to blame for that but seriously I have never met a dog that is more like a person than this one. 

Today I managed to sleep my way through another 24 hour cycle of life but I woke with the most horrific panic.  It was raining.  It was dark and Jon was not here like he was supposed to be.  I flipped.  It was a rainy night almost 19 years ago that my family life was changed forever, so things like this get to me.

I have a spot on my chin that was a pimple that turned into a boo boo because I can't seem to stop picking and fidgeting with things and so I had to have it covered with a bandaid and neosporin in hopes of letting it heal.  It had done a pretty good job of healing until today when I woke to find that Jon had not appeared at the time that he said he would.  In 15 minutes I managed to mangle the newly healing flesh.

When Jon did appear and explained his tardiness the first thing he noticed is the area on my chin.  He was not pleased and immediately questioned why I did it.

Jon:  Jessica did you pick at your chin?

Me:  Maybe.

Jon:  Maybe as in yes?

Me:  Ok...yes.  But it's only because I get anxious.

Jon:  We have got to find something else for you to do when you get anxious.

Me:  I've tried but I always resort to picking at or fidgeting with something.

....and here is where Jon felt that he was having a pure stroke of genius....

Jon:  Well maybe from now on when you are nervous you can just give me a hand job!  Problem solved.

Me:  I don't know...I get anxious a lot.

Jon:  Sounds okay by me.

Me:  Just one problem.

Jon:  Yeah, what's that?

Me:  Chaffing.

I'd like to say that this deterred him.  Instead it sent him into a fit of laughter.  Men!


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