Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Not by the hair on my double chiney chin chin...

Okay...now mother nature is just being fucking cruel.  Is it not enough that I am dealing with the ever present possible demise of my marriage?  But now I have to be reminded of my ever present age.  That is just TOO DAMN CRUEL!  So, I tried to go to sleep but of course insomnia was just too much of a bitch to let that one slip by her.  I laid there for a good hour before I finally gave up and retreated to the couch to take in "Dancing With the Stars" via DVR.  I stepped into the bathroom to piddle one more time before retreating to the couch because alas two kids and multiple surgeries in my Southern nether regions has put a tax on my bladder and THEN....there is where it became ever present that my double chin was NOT alone.

At first I thought "damn, not another zit" seriously I'm in my 30's people when will puberty end?  Must I really give into the ads for the Pro-Active face wash that Jessica Simpson is pushing at 2 o'clock in the morning.  But upon further inspection I found the actual culprit for the raised bump on my chin was the EVIL chin hair.  Must we really be dealing with this RIGHT NOW!?!  Really RIGHT NOW?!?  My marriage is hanging by a thin, thin....did I mention THIN thread.  Yep...I put it out there and still the chin hair is there.  Right there.  Front and center.  Life is so frickin cruel like that. 

Thank you Mother Nature for reminding me that while I think I have found the true reason to focus my attention on you have found your own cruel way to focus my attention on very superficial yet yucky things.  GREAT...just when I had scoffed at waxing...now I've got to go work on my chin region.  Damn you Mother Nature....DAMN YOU TO HELL!!!!


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