Thursday, October 8, 2009

My goal of mediocrity has not gone unfulfilled.....

I think I've reached a new record of being a quitter.  While I tried very hard not to be OVERLY excited about the job that I had found (after 3 months of looking) and started last week....even I floored myself when after just a few minutes I found myself in the VERY familiar territory of wanting to RUN LIKE HELL from the building. 

The owners were nice.  Major plus.  Which, I must say after my last employer was a complete change of emotions.  Perfect example on my first day they asked how Hannah's birthday party went.  I thought that was sweet, but it wasn't enough to make me want to stay there.  I was trying to get a lay of the office when the first red flag came up. 

They had instructions on how to handle checking in and confirming the schedule.  Simple enough.  When I began to look at the manual in comparisson to the real time schedule of the practice management software I was floored by the fact that I couldn't follow the instructions.  At first I thought it was my inability to follow directions.  I'm a smart girl, but it wouldn't be the first time I'd been tripped up by directions (crunchy manicotti circa 2003 comes to mind....and a blog for another day).  I turned to one of the techs that I was managing for answers to my ever mounting questions, since the owners were with patients, the answer that came out of her mouth took me aback. 

It seems that they weren't staying current on paperwork which wasn't allowing them to check out patients when they left which was then not allowing them to check in the same patients when they returned.  If this was dentistry it would have been bad but manageable since you don't see most patients more than 2 times a year.  If it took you an additional day or two to catch up on paperwork in order to submit the insurance claims you could still be okay.  But being physical therapy you see 90% of your patients every other day.  There were weeks of clinical notes not done. 

Having a strong insurance background the next red flag came from the fact that reports were coming over the fax of claims being processed for patients and dates that I could see clearly in the system had not be notated or charted.  By lunch time I was sick with the thought that there was a pretty apparent situation of unsettling insurance practices going on.

Upon taking a moment to speak with the owner about how it was that the claims were getting paid even though the charting that is required by worker's comp or Medicare in order to be paid I was given a blank stare and a blanket answer of, "in the event of another audit we have up to 48 hours to provide evaluation and prognosis reports to back up treatment".

Oh god...did they just say "another"....that would imply a first...or worse...gulp...others!

I wanted so badly to shut off my conscience to just stay in a place where it truly seemed that family was a priority over the stress of a workday.  A place where they smiled...genuinely...and encouraged friendly banter and socialization.  Ugh...this place could be so good....but prison, for insurance fraud...yeah, that could be hell on earth! I am being WAY dramatic, but still.

I made it to day 3 and that little Jimminy Cricket within me was screaming..."you look horrible in orange"...."run away R - U - N  A - W - A - Y".  All I could see in my minds eye was a horrendous insurance audit that would cripple a small practice such as this and me out of a job once again.  It was time to cut and run.

When I sat down with the owners to discuss my worries they seemed to understand.  They seemed to understand a little too much.  Which made me feel more unsettled about the job and even more sure of my decision to quit.  At the end of our discussion they asked me to take 24 hours to really think about it.  I did so and then told them that I was sorry to have to leave the position.  They seemed genuinely sad that I was leaving. 

In this economy and with our financial state in such a precarious state I feel like such an immense loser for walking away from a paycheck.  I had, once upon a time, believed that my last job would be just last job.  Then when I took this last job, I had thought this would be my last job...well, at least until I finished school.  I beginning to wonder if I will ever find that one place where I fit.  The place where I feel like what I can bring to the table is as valued as I am. 

I think those last two statements are symbolistic of more than just my search for a job...they are words that describe how I feel about my life in general.

Maybe my dishearted feelings towards my career status is just a distraction of a bigger issue.  My disillusionment over my general.

I guess my status of mediocrity remains firmly intact.  Good to know where one stands.  Right in the middle.


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